A Man who was a Boy

I laugh, I cry;
I squirm, I shy;
That was when I was a BOY
Now I am a MAN

I try, I fly;
I struggle, I enjoy;
That was when I was a BOY
Now I am a MAN

I loved, I obsessed;
I hated, I bled;
That was when I was a BOY
Now I am a MAN

I eat, I drink;
I sleep, I wink;
That was when I was a BOY
Now I am a MAN

Iam angry, Im sad;
Im aloof, Im Bad;
That was when I was a BOY
Now I am a MAN

I win, I lose;
I cry, I chose;
That was when I was a BOY
Now I am a MAN

I regret, I curse;
I form Opinions, I burst;
That was when I was a BOY
Now I am a MAN

I played, I made;
I craved, I stayed;
That was when I was a BOY
Now I am a MAN

I flirted, I danced;
I smiled, I glanced;
That was when I was a BOY
Now I am a MAN

I loved her, I wished her;
I enjoyed her, I respected her;
That was when I was a BOY
Now I am a MAN

I came, I conquered;
I lost, I pondered;
That was when I was a BOY
Now I am a MAN

25 years over, quarter life ends
The Boy is dead and the Man is in

Confessions of a confused mind !

Since past few weeks confusion has become my middle name. My own behaviour has become hard to comprehend for myself. I have become far too despondent and far too quite for my own liking. The recent run of events have not helped either. These are some of the incidents and events which has left my mind confused, anxious etc etc

Confusion 1:: What can I do?
The Mumbai attacks have somewhere down in my subconscious mind has left a big scar. I want to do something for my city, for my country but do not know what to do. I feel like a helpless asshole, akin to a child in a striptease club.

Confusion 2: Am I not Employable?
Placement season has commenced in my institute and with due respect to my batchmates who have been placed, I genuinely feel I should have been placed by this time. Although only 20% batch has been placed, I believe my name should have been there, but the wait has just increased. It is a test of patience for a man not known for being patient.

Confusion 3: Does friendship last the distance?
Three of my good friends have just got married and a couple of them will be getting soon. Iam elated and really happy for them but I also know for the fact that I wont get too much time to spend with these friends. Two of the three are female friends and it makes all the more difficult for me to even meet them. Life changes after marriage with added responsibility and friends may not occupy important place in that life. Will it be difficult to maintain old friendships after marriage, I wonder?

Confusion 4: What is the purpose of my life?
I realize for the fact that everything is ephemeral in life. We study hard to get a good job, work hard to get a good salary and eventually a good spouse, love to get love in return. We buy the best of clothes to look good and make an impression, buy the best house to have a comfortable life.

We want wealth, we work day and night to earn, earn and earn more. Then one day death comes and we depart naked from this earth and whatever wealth we have acquired we leave it for someone who has never worked for it.

We study to gain knowledge, to gain intelligence so that world thinks that we are next Einstein in making, so that companies can hire us based on our so called knowledge and intelligence and what happens after some years, both wise man and fool wind up in grave before both are forgotten.

We love with all our passion and might so that we get love in return and we do get it in some cases. After some years both the lovers bite the dust and return to the mother earth. Do love stories live forever?

So why have we come to this earth, when everything one day will be destroyed and long forgotten. I am hoping that I get my answers sooner than later. Till then Iam trying to enjoy my confusions, atleast my mind is thinking !!!!

Me Mumbaikar: Proud to be an Indian

The recent run of events, the ghastly acts of terrorism, the incessant firing has not only left me but the entire nation in a state of shock. If 2006 was bad, 2008 has been worst. 60 hours of fighting nonstop, it cant get worst than this. The violence shown for those 4 days was ineffable.

Iam a hard core mumbaikar, born and bought up in this wonderful city, the city of dreams, but alas it has become a city vulnerable to terrorists. Even words wont be enough to loath these terrorists, who claim they are fighting for their religion, but no religion in this world teaches to kill innocent people. These people do not belong to any religion. They cannot be muslims, because they are devils.

The horrific scene on the streets of colaba and Gate way of India has left me numb. I have been to this place so many times, and just to see a bunch of terrorists attacking my city, my country makes me feel that time has come for action. The so called leaders of our nation our politicians are completely inept and incapabale of doing anything concrete. Mr raj thackerey, who made hue and cry about north Indians, where has he gone now? The commandos, the navy, the NSG had people from north India too. Had these men refused to come to Mumbai what would have happened? Why did not raj issue diktat to stop these men from entering Mumbai, they were also form north India. That man can only speak and instigate innocent people but when time comes he will be the first one to hide. That is a sign of a coward and not a leader. Raj says he is a true mumbaikar, where the hell are you now? Mr raj, you and your bunch of followers are nothing but a bunch of cowards who can show their power to innocent people and the run away like cowards when the time comes. This is also true for other politicians, who just say and do nothing. Indian politics at its worst.

Iam a proud mumbaikar, but Im fed up of this nonsense, how long we will suffer? Sometimes people from Shiv sena and now mns terrorise the common man, they declare bandh in Mumbai, as if Mumbai is their father’s property, spread hatredness among people just for some votes and sometimes its the terrorists. Once these politicians are stripped of the security they get then they will realize what is it to live a life of a common man on the street.

Guys this is our city, our lovely city, and if we don’t save it, who will. If the politicians have some soul left in them, they will unite with the common man and be rest assured once that happens no one can ever touch Mumbai. These terrorists take advantage because we are not united, we are not prepared, just waste time in dirty and petty politics of north and south India, without realizing we are just one. God never made a difference when he created mankind. He has given everybody 2 legs, 2 hands, 2 eyes, red blood etc etc. Then when the creator does not make any differences who are these politicians to label someone as good or bad, what right they have to pass judgements about people or their religions, surely the bad will be punished, but what are these inept leaders doing by being prejudiced.

I request all the Indians to get united and face up the challenge that lie ahead. Once we are united, prepared, these idiots (terrorists) cannot even touch us. Anti terror laws have to become more stringent and there should be compulsory military training for the youth. It’s time for action folks, lets stand up and be counted so that tomorrow when we step out of house, we can held our head high and move without fear. Let the brave new world of change, peace and prosperity usher in. Inshallah